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Its been so long and its been A Year!

I've been out of touch with the blogging world, but I was not away from the net! Sometimes the weeks has been pretty routine so its going to be bored reading the same thing every week.

I'm so blessed with my 'motherhood' and dating life. I think I'm so out date with the two things that my friends has already gone through. Weekend has always filled up with usual Bowling at ECP or Kallang Leisure Park or sometimes it will be FunLand at Parkway Parade. Then later it will dinner at Simpang Bedok or Parkway Parade Banquet. Weekdays will be dating time.. Ok I will not say too much cause my 'daughter' reading my blog! haahaha..

This days, I'm very occupied with pre wedding preparation for Nizam, Yazid's younger brother. 70% of the preparation is all done. Just waiting for the day which is 2 weekends away only! All this months, I've been liasing with Nizam via email and sms. We've never meet each other. Only last month, I met Nizam and Zuraidah for the 1st time at their place. And we are getting along just fine, Alhamdulliah..

I wasnt able to meet up with CK last few days, she send a msg via FB telling that she's leaving to KL for good. F got a job offer there or something so they're moving. All the best to you, Insya ALLAH we'll meet up again one day!

Life has been a lot of Ups' and Down.. however, its manageable. Sometimes I feel that I'm just being unreasonable and always make things difficult when its decision making. But I dont deny I'm selfish, cause I'm not willing to share.. But when its family time, kids are The Priority and I'm a 2nd class Citizen. When the children is concern, I'm ok with being the 2nd.. I'm cool! But its ok, you argue and fight once a while.. If everything is soooo smooth saling, something is not right some where.

Ah! The weather is not really fine this days, its soo HOT in the noon but once a while it rains heavily. I was at the clinic this morning, there were so many kids that falls sick. And I'm the only adult! Oh gosh, it so unbareable. I'm having this rashes all over my body. My at this point it still itchy! Ok as long as it didnt get to my face, its OK to me.. But it still matters! Yazid said, "ah nanti kalau ada sand paper I beli kan you eh.." haahah.. bloody chendol!

He's be on night shift today, till 10am. I just asked him if he recall what was going on just last year. He remembered.. Its been A Year now, and tmrw they be having Kenduri at his place.

To Mama, The children misses you all the time. They often mention you. I know I will never be able to replace you and I will never be able to do just like what you did. But I hope I will do my best.. Insya ALLAH.

Jan 2008 : T3 Changi Airport

In Memory of Almarhum Salinah bte Ahmad : Al-Fatihah - 1969 to 6th April 2008.

Family Bonding..

Its the Month of March now. The time is moving pretty fast I felt. I remembered chatting with Fadzil, my colleague, somewhere Ramadhan of 2008, that he planned to get married in 2010, "lama lagi lah" he said. Just last Tuesday, I asked him about his planned, he told me its March 2010.. means its just a year away from now. Age is catching up man!

I was out last Sunday, the almost usual place of Bowling at East Coast and dinner at Banquet Parkway Parade. And I've not seen the kids for so long.

The Ayah and Daughter just back from their Bonding session at Malacca just days before that. It seem Nadiah enjoy herself there, so does the Ayah. Its like a break that he really needed for the longest time.. The best part was... He didnt take pictures of Nadiah at ALL! He was enjoying taking picture of the places and scenery instead.. The only picture with Nadiah on it is this one.

Nadiah planned to meet her Mak Busu, Yazid's youngest sister, on Monday. He suggested that I should go along and meet Siti Nuraini since we've not meet at all. So I told myself that I should give it a Go. So Monday, after work at noon, I went to meet them at Tampines MRT. I've seem Siti on pictures so when I saw someone at the MRT Station, I was unsure if that her or not.. Nadiah arrived and we were formally introduced then. She is sooo young, still in her teens and can pass out as Yazid's daughter actually. She look younger in person anyway. We went lunch and shopping and thats when we got comfortable with one another. The 3 of us spend almost half the day together. We finally settle down at Simei Starbucks at the end of the day. I'm really glad to finally meet her..

I was out with Kak Suz and Riah yesterday after work to Joo Chait complex. I have in mind to buy some material. So we went straight to what we have planned for and they finally got my idea of what I want to purchase. They are good at bargain, I manage to get it at $10 per suit and I bought 4 pieces. Going to wear it for Nizam's wedding, insya ALLAH..

Weekend's coming. There's 3 wedding going on this Sunday and all are 2nd cousin. Last Sunday was Intan's anak Cik Faridah's wedding. Raudha and me attended the Dinner as well as the Sunday jemputan. Amazingly, I met my Primary 1 classmate Azlindah. She look the same but mature. She was shocked to believe that I still remember her clearly. Its so nice to see old friends back again. Her mom asked, "anak awak berapa?" Nak aje ku cakap 3.. Instead, I said, "belum kahwin lagi." Ah tipu lah belum kahwin lagi, eh makcik I wish I dont have to tipu.. I wish that I'm already married and my daughter is already 14years old Makcik.. If I were to come with Nadiah, she can say I tipu belum kahwin right? heheeeehe..

Its a Reminder..

The week started pretty hectic. There was a conference going on back in the office from Wednesday till Friday. I was pretty occuppied with 'food management'! Yes, I was given the task to take charge of the Tea Breaks and Lunch for the whole conference. Wed was the beginning of 'everything'. I arrived as early as 8.25am, making sure that the conference room has been open and the tables has been arrange nicely. Infact, I've arrange the table the day before fit for 22 people.

After getting the morning tea break ready back to my office tables with usual office task. I receive Raudz call telling me that Tok is not well. He has called all his children back home but he looks ok, but not ok! I got confused.. I'm in the middle of the conference arrangement, how am I to leave the job task and go back home? Ayah called about 30mins after that, telling me not to rush. Tok is Ok but he seems confused.. I heard him Mengucap at the back ground and my heart start pumping so fast. Eh, what is going on ni?? Its unlike Tok to call everyone back home.. and this doesnt sound good at all. Had to tell my AM that I Have to leave.. Home is important. Saf called me, asking if I'm in the office. She wanna go back Tok's place with me..

At 11am, after calling Yazid telling him what was going wrong. Actually he was the 1st person I called to inform. I believe he will understand me better in this kind of situation. He calm me down, asking if I am ok. I told him I am.. So met Saf at the MRT, took the train back home. Saf kept repeating, "macam mana ni Intan??? kenapa dgn Tok ni? I takut ah.."

Reached home, everyone was around. All was near Tok. Yes he seems confused, but he managed to baca all kinds of Doa in full. He zikir Ya ALLAH, he said Insya ALLAH many times. But when he starts talking, everything seems to be jumbled up. Safiah jadi Basirah.. and he kept asking, "sapa ni eh?" .. We said, Liza.. "ah sapa ni eh?" He got stressed up not being able to pronunce and remember Liza till he broke down and cry.. We were all so helpless. He kept counting the number of children he has. Trying very hard to remember all their name.."Mohd... Mohd..." the 2nd name he cant recall, when all his son's name starts with Mohd for Rahim, Rashid, Razali and Rafid..

Toward late noon, Bapak Rahim decided with the rest that should call the ambulance and send him to hospital instead. By then, he was slightly better.. That was after Bibik gave him medication for the heart. He starting to recall some people, that was already 6pm.

That evening, Ayah followed the ambulance and was send to A&E at TTSH. At almost 9pm, he was warded and many test was being done to him that night. The next day, we were told that he was having a minor stroke and there was a blockage on his neck. Probably the blood didnt flow up to the brain and that causes the temp memory lost. Yesterday, he gets better and this afternoon when I went to visit him, he was much much much better. Kak Liza tested him asking who am I, he said "Milda!" haahaha..

Alhamdulliah Tok is getting better, berkat Doa from so many people. Insya ALLAH he should be discharge in the next few days or so..

I'll be given another task to cater for department lunch early March. I'll have to enquire a few places.

Next week on Thurs, Nadiah and her Ayah will be on a School Mallaca Historical trip for 2D1N. Nadiah was surprise that her Ayah really mean it about following the Parent Support Group team. That was after I encourage Yazid to go and probably bond with the daughter.. Yazid said, "you gonna miss me tau?" Its ok lah, be apart for a little while, then we get to appreciate each other better. If not, we meet every other very very often..

February is very short. Next week is the end of the month already. Then comes March, and soon it will be April. And Nizam's wedding is in less than 2 months.. Soon the card will be out for distribution. That is what happen when its beginning of the year, it moves very fast.

Over Acting?

I didn’t realize that when I care so much, I get over board. Am I obsessed?

I end up getting worried and my mind just refuse to focus and start thinking “ok ke tak?” And now I end up making mistake at work. Who’s fault is it? Mine lah! Maybe that is the only way to show that I care. But I’m helpless when people just refuse to hear. So I end up crying…

Now I notice my another weakness… Care to much, bothered to obvious. Mak kata, kalau sayang sangat kat orang tu, jangan sampai jiwa raga aku serah kan.. Leave 10% to yourself then you learn appreaciate it more.

Learning No 2 – Try to relax, make it less affected. Maybe someone will notice… I'm trying to, but its harder than I expected!