I was at home for the whole week, apart from last weekend sleep over at CCK1. The rest of the weekday are spend at home. I’m getting bored.

Yesterday, I was out with Mak to Arab street and Bugis Junction. We shop for a few material then later went Bugis Junction. Mak said, bring me to places since you’re still not working..

Nya’ sms me at 4pm telling me how tension she was at work with cases to handle. We decided to meet at Town. We plan for dinner at Lucky Plaza. Before that I bump into Vel, we chat for a while and plan to meet up again for dinner with Ros or something.. Nya’ arrive at almost 7.30pm. Had dinner and later went to Taka to shop for a while.. Didn’t get to buy things that we plan to purchase. Went home empty handed actually..

Today I had lunch with Rohana M. We only decide on it yesterday. I was out early since 11am, went to Raffles Place at later headed to East Point where we plan to meet. We had lunch at the basement. My 1^st time there at Hanis. Food was not too bad. We later went around East Point. Didn’t get what we wanted. Rohana suddenly decided why not we go to Geylang instead. Went round TKC, Pasar Geylang looking for things but disappointed with the pricing and choices. Last stop was at Joo Chait complex. I met Abg Kamal, Ayah Angah’s close friends back in their younger days. Chat for a while, its been so long since I last saw him. Went around and shop a bit, satisfied with what was being purchase. Well Done! Final stop for food was at Hjh Maimunah, before I head home. I told Rohana that our schoolmate Kamal is working at Roslan Renovation. I told her why not just pass by who knows. Surprisingly, he was there sitting near the enterance. He was not sure who this 2 ladies standing in front of the window looking at him. I signal, “kamal kan?” He then realise who I was when I told him my name. At least it’s a fruitful day, meet people, shop around and spend some quality time. Meeting 2 Kamal’s in a row, how about that.. Thanks to Rohana for the ride home..

I was rather down after hearing that my weekend plan goes down the drain. I thought I was soo looking forward for Sunday, until I heard that I have to make a sacrifies. In which I have to wait for another week.. So there goes Sunday’s Date! And I’m still feeling sore about it. What is 1 week in comparison to the years of waiting man… That’s peanut! I’m just making myself feel good.

Good Girl stay Indoor..

Its been 2 weeks now, I'm stuck at home doing nothing. Its getting monotonous but I cant do much. Apart from that all, I've been watching Ellen in the morning, followed by Oprah then Rachael Ray.. Just love watching those talk shows.

Dont know what is bloody wrong with my net, it get disconnected every few times a day. Its getting on my nerves, especially when I'm in the middle of sending an email. Not too sure if the Modem is down and its the main cause of it or what.. I thought someone was trying to 'steal' my network or something but later realise the modem's lights were all off and causes the disconnection. I'm too lazy to call the helpdesk cause I just hate to wait when the hotline is busy.. Unless its really urgent..

I thought of going out today, but I change my mind. Firstly, I'm not too sure where should I go. I'll rather stay indoor.. Perhaps tomorrow, I hope!

Thought that counts..

It was an emotional day, being alone having to go thru everything without the better half. With a day to celebrate, it means a lot especially with kids to say, "sayang Ayah!" Nothing is worth more than just those words and it does make the day brighter than ever.

A Proud Father of Naqia & Nabil...

I use to do all that for Mak & Ayah. And I'm not surprise they still keep them. When we start open the card album and look at them. I feel so childish having to make those card and putting those words.. hahaha.. We were kids back then, what do you expect lah kan.. Its the thought that counts..

Adjust, Change and Adapt to Life

My life has been a roller coaster ride, But manageable.. I'm thankful to those who were there for a listening ears.. There has been stages in life that I'm going thru. Whatever it is, just have to start somewhere.

I was out with Ayah yesterday, quality time, dont intend to spoilt it with tense subject or topic. So I decided to keep it for now. We went to the PC Show at Suntec. With the past human jam experience taking the MRT crossing to Suntec, I've suggested to take the bus to Shaw instead. During the ride, it does bring back memories to Ayah when we go along Beach Road, Middle Road till we reach our destination. Never have I knew that the Raffles School beside Shaw Tower was where Beach Road Police Station was. That was where Ayah went to do Police VSC during our younger day. We were walking along the road to Suntec - Beach Road bridge, he recall where Cik Leman (Itam) use to play band at the Beach Road Army Camp Station or something..

Just when we arrive at Suntec the crowd was Wow! The PC Show opens at 12noon but we arrive very early thinking (assuming) that it opens at 11.30am. The Q is as if they are giving away free laptop or PC.. Where does all this people come from eh? After browsing not long just as soon as we enter, we settle for Canon Ixus camera. The intension was to purchase a Camera and probably a PC or Laptop. After which I suggested passing by the HP/Compaq booth. There was so many offer but I was feeling slightly mabuk. We decided to leave (because I already feeling like fainting..). Can wait for long, I need to get myself a drink before I faint in the bus or something haha... There should be a drink booth in there man.

This is what happen to someone who Never lekat kat rumah. When its time to stay indoor, I feel like I've not eaten for days.. takde energy. The small TV, the fan, this faithful Laptop of mine and my most comforting bed has been my Best Pal since I'm out of job. I'm doing great anyway hehehe.. Beggars cannot be choosy, ada apa makan.. And that has causes me to grow sideways and its only been less than 2 weeks!

Why lah the oldies band downstairs playing Tender Biru on a Wedding Reception ni. Tak faham langsung.. Tu lagu aku 15 tahun dulu lah chendol! Pa je.

I thought I was going thru massive mess again last week. But when I had my talk with Rohana M and Nya' it feels so much better. I think I should let it out and talk things over, it will not be bottled up. Yet I receive another person telling me this, "you should be able to handle this well at this age apa?" Then I realise what is wrong with me that its causing me to act that way.

I just realise that I'm using this particular pharse too many times, "Its not about you, Its about me." I then recall listening to the same sentence 6 years back, I then know where HE was coming from. I told him before, "Maybe I will be facing the same situation as you and I'll be saying the same thing." And I am now trapped in the same situation when He had it with me back then. Cakap tu satu Doa kadang. So dont say things if you dont really mean it. Baru sajak dgn muka aku. Life is a gamble, you will not be able to predict on things if its a losing game or a victory through out your life.

I've been actively looking and applying for jobs this days. I send at least 5 application per day, or the most like 10 email to agency and companies. Its never been easy for me to get a job, and that was the reason why its been on temps for the past 2 years. I'm not choosy, I just need a simple Recep or Admin or Clerical job. As long as my medical benefits and CPF are well taken care off, I'm happy with it. Honestly.. Maybe judging by my CV it looks as if I'm in and out of jobs, because all those job are Temp assisgnment of 2weeks to 6months. Like as if I'm job hop or something ke?

"Life is full of lots of Ups and Down..." Ya its true and that is the 1st sentence on the Song Shoulder to Cry On. hahaha.. Well life has never been easy if you have to please everyone. You have to take care of peoples feeling, to be concern over what people going to say and all that. But most of the time, its all important because we are Asian. But not all suggestions are for keeps. At the end of the day, it all comes back to you to decide. You have all the time that you need to adjust, change and adapt. And thats what I'm trying to do, Its just the beginning and there is more challenges to come. Good Luck to me!

Anyway, Happy Father's Day to All my Fatherly Friends. Especially to my Ayah and to "Ayah" cause I know where your priorities are..

Catching up on Old Times

My cousin Saf called, asking me to come over Sav since she's off yesterday. But I told her, sorry I've got lunch appointment. She said, what a life you've got not working yet busy with appointment hahaha...

I had lunch with my closest classmate in Sec Sch, Rohana M. Most of the time, our meet ups for coffee or lunch are impromptu. Thats what life of a single ladies like us, we are free to go anytime! hahah.. She came by to fetch me around 1.30pm, when our initial plan was to meet up at Bugis. She was asking me, "eh kau block berapa eh? 10 eh?" I told her, hello kawan Block 10 dah roboh oi!

We settle for lunch at Banquet Raffles Hospital. I've already plan what to have for lunch, its the fish & chip that I cant miss at Banquet. It was a big too noisy there, We had to get out of there for a decent conversation. My dear friend crave for Secret Recipe, we headed on to Plaza Singapura instead. I prefer sitting down with a cup of coffee and talk about everything under the sun. There we so many things that we cover on, open topic and its beyond description. I'm glad we talk everything out. I brought some of our sec school pictures, the most selengeh outfit we put on. The silly pose on camera that we find it most stylo and paling jambu at that time. I guess if our kids were to look at it will say, "eh mama, obit nya!" I'm not surprise...

We go on separate way around 4pm. She drop me at Bencoolen Street, had my Asar there. At least I can still hop on to NEL to meet Nya' at Harbourfront. I was early, Nya' left office slightly late. I just do not want to go around Vivo or HarbourFront because I have the tendency to shop! I just have to save some for rainy day since I'm not working. Or I will have to ask Ayah for some cash/help again hahaha..

Nya' arrive at almost 6.30pm. Meet Azlinah the Webmaster, and she said, "you're here again!" Oh yes, she been reading my multiply.. Nya' and me agreed on our favourite spot at Vivo top floor. I just love to view Sentosa from afar. Oh yes, meet Suzana Adam with Noah at Vivo too. She's here till the weekend or something.. What's with the Imran's fan there are all over Vivo..

Our friend like ayam berak kapor, missing someone. Didnt hear his voice for sooo long. Glad to have called him. Akak Miss You eh!

Oh yes, I hear wedding bells. Glad finally its coming. Not Mine lah! Been single for more than 5 years, deserve someone much much better. Even so much that you've been thru, I'm just glad that you're settling for someone new. Insya ALLAH, my prayers is with you Always. There goes my single babe, I shall make use of all this single time of your till August Babe!

I'm having late lunch with another fellow Sch mate. She's looking for an assistant, so I'm meeting her to catch up on things and at the same time discuss on whats the assistant job is all about.

I totally forgotten Reza's birthday. I remembered some time back Nya' told me his birthday in June or something. But when Nya' mention it last night I had to sms Bro to confirm the date. I thought it was 11th June, its was 1st June lah Chendol! Aku buat kelakar! Its been sometime since Reza, wifey, and bro last met. Even if I'm in KL, they timing is always not right.

Actually, I have a few things to do and settle. But I'm just not in the correct mood to do it. Ok I will have to target to get it settle by next Tuesday the lastest.... I Promise!

Ok got to Go!

A Time on my Own!

I spend a few days all alone and it felt much better. You just need that time in your life to reflect on things, think right and plan what step to do next.

Last thursday, I was out early. When to the bank, clear what ever bill that I have before I go broke the next month. I had my zohor at Moulana, then head to Changi Airport to spend some time to myself. I had a late lunch at McD, thought of asking Rohana M to come by for lunch togather. My cousin Liyana's coming back from her Philippines School Exchange program trip after 10 days. So I took the chance to fetch her at the same time sitting down at the Viewing Hall at T2. Listening to my MP3 and reading my book that is already overdue to return. I spend almost 4 hours there. Receive a faitful call from a Dear friend Za, told her I'm at the airport.. Thanks for the call Za. Suppose to meet Nya' after work but since Liyana's flight is at 6pm, I had to cancel it. Will not be able to make it to HarbourFront by 6.30pm. Andak & Kak Liza with Jannah & Nabilah arrive shortly at 5pm. Liyana's finally check out at almost 6.30pm. Grown up teenager feeling hungry after that long day, we had Dinner at McD (again!). They send me back home and I had an early night.

On Friday, I requested Mak to bake some Egg Tarts for my ex collegues. Since it was a sudden dismissal of service, I didnt have anything to give them. I arrive at the old office around 3pm. After which, I took the bus to Vivo from Ayer Rajah. I went around windown shopping at Vivo. Had a simple lunch at Banquet. A Nice Carrot Cake!

I know that I'm gonna come back to Banquet again for dinner with Nya'. So I had to leave some space for dinner later. And Yes, the carrot cake is sepad giler!

I went to the 3rd floor open space to enjoy the scenery of the Cruise Ship on my right and Sentosa on my right.. I spend another 3 hours there, its so peaceful and I must say its beautiful.

I went back to walk around Vivo since Nya's finishing soon. Met her at almost 7pm, we had dinner at Banquet. We decided to sit and chat at Level 3 (again). We had serious topic right under the moonlight. It will not be the same if you better half if your companion for the night! Thats what Nya' said, not Me! We left the place around 9pm. Q for cab was a dreadful, there was a long Q. We only got the cab at 10.15pm or later..

I had my weekend spend at CCK. Dier & Zaf came for late lunch, they had to leave since there's kenduri at Zaf's side. Saf & Abg Dee came at almost maghrib.Thought they might sleep over, instead left for home after the ladies watch the Indon Scary Hantu movie with McDelivery of McSpicy (and makes Jannah couldnt sleep that night came crawling to sleep in between me & Liyana). The man was watching the Football match and eating prata with Asam pedas.

Another day spend at Vivo again yesterday (why I kept repeating the places I went to eh?). from 12noon till 6plus. This time, brought along Makcik to jalan2. She's been indoor for so long, just need some time to breath some fresh air. Andak Family & Abg Dee family came over out place. Had simple dinner of pizza that Mak & Ayah bought. Kak Liza made macaroni and cheese. Makan apa yang ada & its all so 'busoqna ako'.

And today is another new day. I've been sending out application after looking into the Saturday Recruitment page. I just hope for the best. Insya ALLAH.

I just receive an sms from my sec school mate. She asked me, "you dah ada calon ke belum? jangan asik kerja aje."

For the 1st time for many years my answer was, "Calon? Ada lah kot. Insya ALLAH, kalau jodoh ada tak gi mana lah.." Did that come from me? Its been 5 years, 8 months since my last relationship! And now, I've forgotten how if feels like..

Start All Over Again!

First of all, Thank you to those who read & comment. Thank you for being my listening ears..

Today is a New Day. I just have to start somewhere, now I'm trying to plan my pace & schedule.

I had a talk with the Ops Manager, he has actually asked me out for Lunch. But I'm just too angry to accept the 'date' instead I went with others. Then he had to asked me for coffee instead. He mention about the feedback some managers have for me saying that I work pretty well and they are happy with my work. I dont think he should tell me that good news because there is No POINT AT ALL! He told him in all Honesty that I'm was unhappy & dissappointed that he had to break the bad news to me without giving me much time to prepare my future plans. I know he cant say much, anyway, I just want it out my chest that all.

I still cant bring myself to sit down & send CV for application. Maybe I just need some more time to relax. I'm treating today just like an Annual Leave that I took..

I got to go.. Going places & taking a break, some time to myself...

Was asked to Leave!

I was told yesterday that Today will be my Last Day, they don’t need extra hands. But I feel like its a Term! Since I'm a temp, its not a correct term to use.

I feel that it should have been told much earlier. Guess he knows that I’m unhappy about his announcement, of all people, someone I’m comfortable with had to give me the bad news. He’s trying to be nice today. I don’t feel like talking tell him..

So where should I land now? I will have to start all over again, at the point when I’m comfortable with what I’m doing now. I feel like crying, but I’m not really sure why. I guess it’s the friends that I’m going to miss. At the same time, I’ve very very concern with what’s going to happen to the cash flow. And that I will have to work out on it.

Wish me luck people. I’m going thru another Test in Life again..

Thanks to those who was there for me all day yesterday, eventhough thru sms & phone calls.

Now or Never

I had a peaceful sleep after I get to straight things out last night. I’m glad that I do that and manage to take things and act like an adult. Thanks to those who was more than willing to give their listening ears. We could have done this much earlier.

Time will tell

Its clear cut and obvious to realise that my action was all due to saffocation of being too concern. I dont need to explain much, its understood. But I still feel there was some unfinish business unsettled. I need to act like a mature adult and face it myself. I still want to handle it face to face. Dont worry, I dont need to consult the parents as yet as its still at a manageable stage. I should be able to handle it well at this age. On top of all, only time will tell... Insya ALLAH.

I was at a 2nd cousin's wedding. Khalil Saiful Bahri, is so grown up and married, heard that he's 26years old today as well. Love attending relative's wedding because this is the only time to meet up with the everyone apart from waiting for the next Raya.

Tok Unggal Jailani from JB, came with his family.

The Decor by Istana Wedding is BEAUTIFUL. The Food by families of the Groom actually, is so sedap. I've yet to have my 2nd serving tonight (sebab dapat tapau apa...). A slight dissapointment with the song selection as well as the KaraOKe, Tok has requested to head home earlier sebab dah pening kepala hahaha... I should have brought with me Imran's CD or even burn some nice songs for wedding of relative. So at least I dont have to go to the music counter and asked for Anuar Zain or Imran Ajmain or apa2 lah.. Bawak aje CD sendiri.. I will remember the next time. Here are some pictures of the wedding. Sorry blur, pakai mobile phone aje.

Another week of work, I'm like counting weeks. Hope to get my pay cheq tmrw or Tuesday. I've got plan line up to shop for things heehehe...

Ok got to Go. Tmrw is another new week..

Oh ya and Happy Birthday to CK & Idi.. Mana kau Idi Samirudin senyap aje.. Colorado or KT?