Home and Away..

The week has been occuppied with entertaining people. Attending to guest at home, busy spending time with family and love ones.

Last Friday, I was out with Yazid to Vivo. We've been going to Vivo this days, ever since Nadiah told him, "Ayah, Vivo is Aunty Noris's fav place tau!" I like when we both just sit down and talk about things, everything after spending time at dinner. It really helps to clear things if there are doubt not clarified. I'm beginning to learn and know Yazid even better now. Things that I never knew that happen in his life. We still talk about how I left without saying a word 15years back and all that...

Last weekend, we had a family makan session at Restu Tampines. Jojo has asked all of us out dinner with Fidz, Mak and Ayah, Raudz and Me. Jojo had asked Yazid and the kids along, however they had prior plan and so they couldnt make it. But we made video calls to each other..

So just last Wednesday, 3rd December 2008, Fidz departed for Haj trip together with the medical team. Doakan dia selamat and sihat menjalan kan tugas nya di sana, Amin.

We all send her to the airport that day. Jojo came slightly later because he had to attend course and sit for an exam the week after. Yazid came to the Terminal to send Fidz off as well. That was Yazid's 1st time meeting Mama, Mak Uda and Mak Adik. Cousin Mala and Azmi was here too, well they are no stranger to him because the 4 of us were working in the same roof more than 10 years back. Thanks for the kind words Mala, Doa for us, Insya ALLAH.

Everyone fall ill after sending Fidz to the airport.. Raudz and Ayah already lose their voices and start coughing. Later that night, Yazid lost his voice and the fever came back, followed by Tok down with Flu and cough. I was feeling uncomfortable already, get myself some Vitamin C and Panadol Flu Max! Sedia kan Payung sebelum hujan hahah... And last night, my cough gets harder. And so as Mak's.. Everyone is not well. I hope Fidz doing good there Insya ALLAH.. And hope Jojo's sihat too.. Kesian dia sorang sorang.

Nabil's down with fever too, yesterday I just heard Nadiah coughing as well.. Semua orang sakit lah.. macam mana nak Raya ni?? heehehe..

Today, we're invited to Safia's Savanah BBQ. I hope the kids are well so they can be there as well.. Insya ALLAH..

My swap off has been approve for 15 Dec, Monday. So as Yazid's AL..The girls has plan lined up. Let them plan it, and the Ayah drive us..

Its Raya on Monday.. Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Adha everyone.

Believe, Faith and Hope

I was in the situation where I am 'di dalam pertimbangan'. At one point, as there were too many voices telling me what I should do, I had to keep myself away from those voices because I was totally 'hilang pertimbangan'. I had to put myself together and start thinking for myself instead of other. I set my priorities right and get back on track...

Alhamdulliah, all that has been solve and rectified. I believe in faith.. No matter how you want it to be, if you faith is strong and you believe things happen for a reason, good or bad, it just happens.. At the end of the day, its all 'keputusan aku sendiri..' I hope everyone respect my decision just like how Mak believe in me.. Segala gerak kan datang dari naluri seorang ibu. She knows me better than any other person, Doa ibu itu di makbulkan ALLAH, insya ALLAH.. Amin.

The week has been wonderful and great. It really improve the whole situtation. I'm glad that we talk about it, clear the air and make it better. Communication is as important that any other thing. And I like it settle there and then and you will not have the grudge between each other..

I made a Video call to Y 2 days ago, its was so hilarious.. haahaha.. We both we so 'jakun', it was his 1st video call and we end up laughing non stop.. He said it was raining heavily in the east. I said, its so bright and sunny here at Kallang.. So I made the call, "hey you checking on me eh? haahaha..." It gets addictive followed by a few more V-calls, gosh! Oh I so Love the technology.. But not too much of video call, concern the charges and bill goes up the ceilling!

Its almost at the end of the year. How fast the time flies... Every year I will asked myself, what have I achieve for the year? What have you done, cause things in life, relationship, job.. ALL should gets better. Duniawi and Ukhawi.. All have to bertambah. I'm not a saint lah kan, but you should admit your mistake, cause you can ALWAYS lie to people, but you can lie to yourself. When its your fault, you should say, "Its MY mistake" but not "OUR mistake". There is NO OUR in this case.. Dont blame it on others..

Key words here are:

Rule 1: No Lie or even Excuses - We HAVE practice Honesty.. It hurts, but you just need to know the whole truth, nothing but the truth!

Rule 2. No Secret - We dont keep it from each other.. Even almost EVERYThing.. Yes again, it hurts, but Its for the best of everything..

Ok for now! Adios..

Getting Hitched

I've receive a wedding invitation from my sec sch classmate Foaad.. Congrats to him. We'll see you 27th December 2008.

I'm extremely shocked to receive an email from a best pal in KL. He's requesting for my address to send invitation card! I had to call him, I had to asked "you jangan main main eh? Betul ke tidak ni?" He is one of those guy friend who never BELIEVE in getting married... I think! sorry you bloody chendol! But I'm glad, extremely delighted to hear that coming from him. I bluntly said,"ya lah dulu aku nak kau, kau tak nak dgn aku..." hahaha... I dont know, if I can make it on the 20th December 2008 to KL.. Congrats Bro, Finally!

We had our kenduri at my place over the weekend. Alhamdulliah it turn out good. Its just a family gathering.. Doa for Fidz - Norafida bte Ismail that she's save departing to Mekah and arrive back home too.. Insya ALLAH.

Fourteen years back, I remembered this date. It was a Faithful Friday, back in 1994. I know pretty well what day it was, and what was going on that evening. I told Nya' I do not want to go home straight after work. That late afternoon, we sat down at Changi Beach instead. Watching the airplane passes by over our head. We start counting the flight and guess what airline it is.. As the plane passes by, it leaves a loud sound and I scream cause I bet no one can hear me.. That was the faithful date when Y had his Solemization.. The day he Nikah. I clearly remembered that.. But I never attend it, never want to be there watching you Dear!

Yet again, I still feel that its all about Jodoh. If its meant to be then it is.. Yes or No its still up to HIM to decide. We can plan it, but still its all up to HIM.. I can only hope for the best for me... Amin.

Racun itu pahit! Just hope I dont have to swallow it anymore.. Never!

lastly.. Happy Birthday Raudz!

Space for Changes

Alhamdulliah, ALLAH telah membuka jalan and memberi pertunjuk di atas semua kebenaran. Aku bersyukur kerana kuat menghadapi nya.

The space is there for all changes and amendments. I believe that things happends for a reason. And I will always be here for you.

Everyone makes mistakes, its a matter of how you want it amended.

I will still be here, but you need to give me the time...

My faith is with you, Always!

back track..

I've been in touch with my Sec School mates this days. Been viewing the old time pictures, seriously right, it looks so 'kental' hahaha.. I've been trying to peel of those pictures from my old paste album but I'm concern that I might tear it off.. That will be even worst.

I woke up this morning, feeling good about things. With so much positive vibes around me. Yesterday's conversation with a friend really makes me open my mind thru a lot of things. We talk about anything under the sun. I wasnt really close to this friend back in school. No doubt, we talk beside saying the usual Hi and Bye, but we didnt really share anything personal. People SHOULD change over the years, but if that person remain the same even after more than 10 years then something is not right some where.. Seriously! With all that everyone gone thru, you should change, either in looks.. most of the guys, after they got married, they either grow side ways or lost of hair hahah.. The ladies, after married, you either put on more after given birth or otherwise. If you remind the same, in appearance and also in thinking and character, then I am wondering why! So you either change for the better or opposite..

There were so much memories back in school. Not forgetting the crushes I had with this person and that person. There were also people who refuse to speak to me at all knowing I like them. They dont feeling flattered at all. Well I'm a clear cut 'selengeh' looking k heehehe.. How could anyone possibly be attracted to me, oh gosh. Its a laughing matter, thinking back, never feel kecik hati at all. But its a most wonderful memories that I can tell my children one day haahahaa..

Just like what my friend said, all this make one stronger. No doubt wiser, its all part of life. SO Grow up and MOVE ON! It not like we are living in the teens anymore. Its time to make decision and plan, whats best for you.

I am so into going back on memory lane..

Anything but Anuar!

On impulsive act, I bought a the 2nd highest price tickets to Anuar Zain's Concert. Ayah suggested that Mak go along with me to enjoy the moment. The decision about going was only made on Thursday at 5pm. Went online, Ayah handed the his card and book them! And that evening, went to collect them.

Honestly, I knew it very very very well, that if I didnt get to go I will be at home thinking "must miss lagu itu and lagu ini." However, I'm sad that Nya' couldnt come with me. She miss ALL of those shows with Anuar. Takpe Nya' kalau ALLAH izinkan, sampai bila bila pun akan ada pertemuan nya.. Just remember the moment on the phone with him few years back Nya', that will make you feel real goooood...

So there I was with Mak, left home after Maghrib to Esplanade. Feeling excited, at the same time I know that I will meet people. There were some who claim that they will SURE meet me...

I sing along to ALL the songs, the opening of Keabadian Cinta, then somewhere in the middle was Permata and at the end were Teman Terulung. That really reminded me to Nazrah, I keep telling Mak, "ni lagu Naz, Mak."

PlayPause is responsible for all the Creative Flyers & souvenior Programme.. WELL DONE PlayPause! Syabas.

The crowd was a bit noise, I was expecting to 'tangkap feel' listening to the slow numbers just like how i listen to them over MP3 when you're feeling down.

The usual people are still as faithful as us, Diana, Gee, Tini and a few more of those from our previous Hang Out Raya Gang. I'm sure Zee and Wan will feel the warm that Anuar given when he meet the person, he will make you feel important. Then you will keep coming and coming..

Ok, enough of that. Today there are wedding and kenduri to attend.. On a different note, I'm feeling slightly better and calmer, Alhamdulliah..

Enjoy the reminding of a wonderful Sunday!

Through out the WHOLE show, my mind and heart was somewhere else. You never left my heart, trust me.. I'm sorry Abang. This is for you..

Hanya Milikmu

Aku tak salahkan hatimu, Bila harap itu tak ada, Tak relakan bila terjadi, hanya waktu yang tentukan. ku ingin kuatkan hatimu (setiamu), Yakin ku hanyalah milikmu, Besar cintaku tak berubah, Walau kini rasa itu luluhkan hatimu. c/o Ku hanya milik mu, Coba kau rasa yakinnya hatiku, Meski kau tinggalkan, Masih ku milikmu, Mengertikah bila cinta ini, Tak akan pernah sedikit pun pudar, Selain untuk mu (untuk mu). Ku harapkan hanya padamu, Ketulusan ini nanti kan ku jalani, Tetap ku milikmu, Mengertikah bila cinta ini, Memang tak pernah sedikit pun pudar, Selain untuk mu

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pantai dah berubah..

Something has gone wrong... Test been more challenging. I'm going thru another test in life.

I am able to take it calmly, yet again, if its meant to be then its meant to be..

ALLAH menentukan segalanya, Hanya dia yang tahu apa yang kita Tidak ketahui. Kebenaran akan terbukit kelak Insya ALLAH. Setiap sesuatu itu terjadi ada hikmah nya. Aku Redha akan ketentuan nya. Segala nya datang dari NYA.

Doakan agar Aku lebih kuat menghadapi segala nya ini. Insya ALLAH.

There are things in life that you know very well that you’re not willing to let go off. You still hold on to those things from the past and ponder over it wonder why this and why that.

Lately I had the time to myself, sitting down somewhere quiet and peaceful, re think about things and considering over matter if I’m at the right path. I use to do that a lot especially when I’m feeling confuse over things and time some time to myself. I did that on a lovely Saturday afternoon at Clarke Quay (near Moulana Mosque) spending more than an hour there.

I went all the way back 10years back, thinking what has happen to people from the past. Hope he is doing fine with his family, if he has another child already. His daughter must have already 5years old right now. Ya, he was my first love.. Was he? I was 26yrs old that time.. Then I recall back, the person I thought was my 1st love, actually he was not. It was someone else back when I was 21yrs old! It was Y..

I received THE wedding invitation last Saturday, sms the Groom thanking him for the invitation. I said, glad that you met your ‘jodoh’ not knowing that the person is so near to you all this while. He replied back, “she was the person who initiate and persuade me to get to know you when you 1st join us back then.”

That night, on the phone with Y. Before even I get to tell Y about it, he already sense it. He said to me last night, “I think He still thinks of you..” Alah, I baru nak story what he said to me, you already said that.. No lah, come on, he must be greatful that there is someone who appreciate him more not like I do. I know its not easy to forget whats in the past. I’m sorry, I’ve cause all the hurt. I will doakan the best for him, Insya ALLAH.. He will has a the new challenge, an instant Teenage Daughter..

I thought that I’ll be asked to attend a conference this Friday, to help out in the event. Unfortunately (or fortunately) I don’t have to go, but then, I’ll be all alone in the office when all my ‘gangs’ going away half day. Then I will have to lunch alone… But I know I dont have to stay late and going home alone from the jauh venue the held it..

I just got a called, I've got people telling me things. But its alright, I do not wish to jump into conclusion. Back to what I said time and again, If it happens, then it happens lah.. Biarlah Takdir menentukan. HE know what the best for hamba2 nya. Its ok to listen to things, but open you mind and absorb it. Then you know how to act on it..

I love my off day..

Family Gathering.. Quality Time..

Last Sunday was my 2nd cousin, Tura's wedding. The family is staying the opposite block to us. Just like how I predicted, my mom's cousin come over to visit Tok who is just next door to us. We were at the wedding venue since Saturday. Even though there was not much 'rewang' to do, but the presence of the extended family gathering was already happening. I had to forgo the open house invitation by Julyani that same Sunday because I was more concern about the relative coming over to our place..

On Monday - Divali PH, I have made prior plans with Y to bring the kids out. I also suggested going to the Zoo during the school holidays. Didnt know that Y told the kids that WE are all going to the Zoo on Monday. Naqiyah sms me asking, "aunty Noris, are we going to the Zoo on Monday?" Told her have to discuss it with Ayah as yet. The plan was, if we are going to the Zoo, I was going to ask Zaf to assist on free passes at least we can save some entrance tickets. Y spend almost $100 for 5 of us including the tramp ride.. "$92!" Mak datuk! Lemah lutut when I heard the cashier said the amount.

I knew very well that Y will never thought of food, I have it all plan before hand. Mak help me with Roti John and I fried some epok2 and fish nuggets for the kids. Dah nama nya budak, mesti lah cepat lapar kan.. I remind myself to buy drinks at Cheers or 7eleven. Dah agak mesti lupa, we had to make do with buying drink at the push cart at $2 for a bottle of coke. Lemah lagi aku.. Mahal. Duit abis macam air!

It was raining at almost 3pm. Alhamdulliah, Y bought the tickets with tramp ride or else we will have to walk in the rain.. Drove back home, on the way, Y stop at Masjid Tempatan Sembawang to sempurnakan the fee for his korban this year. My 1st time at the Mosque, it was rather remote, but it looks really kampung around the area. I met my cousin Isham who is attending to the drama shooting with the Local Artist. Y said, it was for Raya Haji drama..

I really enjoy the day, so were the kids. Nadiah and Naqiyah indeed enjoy themselves that day. So as Nabil..

Tomorrow, we will be gathering at Angah's place at Riverina View. They are having kenduri for their Departure for Haj and I clearly remembered its Haris and Angah's birthday tomorrow.. There will be more kenduri and more wedding in the coming weeks.. There will be Shariff cucu Tok Ngah's wedding on the 9th Nov. I hope I should be expecting a wedding invitation (that I've been waiting for) on the 16th Nov, Jumari will be getting married. He has sms me last week. I told him, I'll be coming with my Partner! haahaha..

My 2nd sister Norafida, will be departing for Haj this 3rd December Insya ALLAH. Please send some Doa for her, hope she is in good health and be back home save. She will be going alone, departing with the MUIS medical team. Alhamdulliah, she got selected a few months back after a few hundred of them attended the interview.. We will be having a kenduri for her at out place soon too, insya ALLAH..

I've been going thru some test in life. But I'm handling it well, Alhamdulliah. Thank you to those who give me logical feedback and comments. It really knock some sense onto me. Two (or more) heads is better than ONE!

Have a good weekend Ahead!

silent annoucement..

If you dont get invited Noris, dont be dishearten. Its alright.. There must be a reason why you're not in the invitation list. Perhaps, it will make that 'luka lama berdarah kembali kot?" hehehe.. Ok I'm trying to console myself. I've people telling me that they got invited but I been telling them, No tak dapat pun...

Anyway, I've been bumping into old airport friend this days especially when I'm out with Mak or other friends. But so far when I'm out with Y, we didnt meet any of OUR old colleagues anywhere. Maybe, its was not time yet. ALLAH belum izinkan.. So when I meet this people, I will tell Y. The best part was, when he met this people at work, he will asked or talk about it. Most of them knew about us being together the last time. So when they heard about us getting back together NOW, they get very surprise about it. I'm glad that Y is ready to tell them about us 'patching back' thats what he always tell them. "Dia tunggu kau lah Y!" That was what they said to him. I didnt wait for him eh, I dont want people getting the wrong idea all together that I've remain single all this years and I'm like 'right here waiting'. Please eh, I move on after we broke up. I meet and date and got engaged before anyway. Well, I should give credit to Y for telling them about us.

I had an exchange sms with a close friend. Telling me that I SHOULD consider the feeling of Y's kids making sure that they agree with me being with their Ayah. So far things are going fine, but we are working things out. I remembered Y's sentence everytime we talk about things.. he always said to me, his children comes first and thats his priority. To me, anything that has to do with th children or his Abah I will hve no objection. If any plans has to be cancelled because of this people, I have no said about it. Oh yes and work to.. If work calls, I am the last on the list too.

Ok well said, I'm so in the mood to clear things up. Not TRYING to make people agree with me, but need people to understand me. I know not everyone agrees to my idea of having to accept someone new like Y who is a father of 3. But to me, as long as my parents agree, my dearest Atok likes Y, my family accepted it then I will go ahead with it. At the same time, the Doa's are most important in what ever you do. I will follow my heart and the sign that I get thru prayers, the rest just follows...

Nadiah just got her results, she sms her Ayah that she'll be in Sec 2 Normal Academic next year, Alhamdulliah. Congrats Darling.. You need to work harder next year..

Ok enough said.. Ciao!

Visiting..

Our visiting is almost done... I think! Actually right, Raya visiting will never never end. Trust me. Probably I suggest you guys continue them over Raya Haji instead heheh.. Its still Raya anyway.

Nya' Nurul & Me

Nya's husband, Mansor & kids Aqim and Syirah

Well, I had some guest over last Sunday. Nothing special, just some old friend gather for lunch. The reason for it was to get some old friend to meet up after so long. Nya' Nurul and family came over, at the same time I had Y came along with the kids. Nya' have not met Y ever since we last single and left our Airport days. So its gonna be the 1st time after 14years..

Myself, Raudha, Nadiah and Naqiyah

And they make friends, Nadiah, Naqiyah, my cousin Liyana and Jannah

3 more friends(& family) couldnt make it due to some last minute family situations. But its ok, there is always next time, Insya ALLAH.. Things are unavoidable.. My cousins Dier and Zaf came over as well. Kak Liza, Andak and the kids where there as well. I invited Chandra as well. Makasih for the cupcakes and the kerudung cantik itu Mbak heheh..

I'm just super lucky cause the PH seems to fall on my working days. I've went thru the calender, only Christmas falls on my off day. But its alright.. I'm asking Y to plan something for the Divali PH this monday. School holidays coming, I've already thinking on what to plan for the holidays.. Zoo visit will be great isn't it? Weddings are also lining up like 3-4 wedding invitation per week. We be having a relative's wedding this weekend and the live just opposite us. We can practically wave to each other across our blocks.. There's gonna be another family gathering again.. Trust me!

I heard another old friend of our getting married this weekend as well. Didnt know that He got divorce few year back or something.. I remembered this friend ever told Y back 15years ago why is he going out with me when he know that there was another suitors aftering me. hahaha.. Y told him, "well best man wins lah." And now the other suitor is getting married in a month time..

Thank you for all the concern by my last entry. Nothing serious actually, but that I was surprise to be the last to know. But its ok, I've manage to get it all under control, Alhamdulliah.

I have just purchase some dresses from Luuvely.. I'm excited to get it via my mailbox and wear it soon hahah.. Thanks!

shocked!

I was surprise to heard it, didnt expect it to come. But its a good news Alhamdulliah. I suddenly turn emotional.. The thought of being separated it sad. Suddenly I felt left out.. That was only when I got another shocking one as well.

I know I where I stand, I cant afford it. If I cant even manage myself, then I have every reason not to be included. So in which, I'm going do be all myself.

I never like to plan things, I just dont dare to imagine things anymore. If things happens, then it happens. I believe that if its meant to be, then it is. Even up to this day, I never like to hear promises. You can promise me the world, but I will only believe when the time comes.

SO now, what is going to happen next? I'm not to sure. Cause even a proper prepared event, can just called off just like that.. It all up to HIM.. Whatever will be, will be...

anger management...

Flaming with anger, dissapointed for not telling the whole truth about things. Lie was created to save other but the blame gets into another. And you... you just kept quite without defending the whole truth. Dont fancy that style, its educating the youngesters to tell a lie. Dont blame them if they 'kelentong' you in the end cause you just show them how to do it. Dont know if you're fully ready to begin a new commitment. Or just to scared that the whole bomb shell will hurt the other..

Anyway, I was out with Nadia on Tuesday. We get to spend time just the two of us. So much things was shared until 'tak terkutip' all the stories that came to me. I know there were things that I was not told, and not forgetting those that I already knew all along. Overall, I just like this bubbly lady cause I see so much of me in her! I think that was how Za think of me when I tell her stories and she just let me continue telling them.. Well then, I met her at Tampines MRT, then we took the train to Bugis. Had our lunch at Banquet Raffles and later we headed to Bugis Street to jalan jalan. I was actually looking for a pair of shades, got them and at the same time bought a grey color shoe. Decided to continue the window shopping at Tampines Mall, she called the Ayah telling him that she want to get her ear pierce (and thats when she got into trouble for doing that, I'm sorry again, I'm responsible for it!). I just realise that she do not have any piercing at all. We scout for one at one of the jewellery store, but it was too expensive. Suddenly recall that they have such service at 77th Street, I asked the lady if its save and if the studs are sensitive free and all that stuff. Nadia got worried if it will hurt her badly.. But the lady manage to distract her and she didnt know that it was coming at all.. hahah..

We left after the piercing, I send her to Simei MRT, in which we say our goodbyes. I notice a familiar people, husband and wife, near that, to only realise it was Y and my ex colleagues from the Airport days. They notice that I was walking with this girl so seem familiar as well. And later I had to announce that I'm dating Y now and they said "Ohh... bagus lah.." I hope they dont tell 'the whole world' in the Airport!

I'm super enjoying the Ayam Penyet new branch at Raffles Place Banquet. The original branch at Marine Parade area, has been my favourite since it tried it some two years ago. Edy, the boss, was at the new branch yesterday. Guess he didnt recall me at all lah kan.. But dont care lah, ayam penyet kat sedap tu yg important! I'm craving for it again and again.. You will have to be there early to beat the lunch hour crowd.

I am glad that I get to be in touch with Shyreen back again. I'm glad that even when I lost her correct mobile number, she has manage to look for mine and sms me on 1st week of Raya. Alhamdulliah.. I'm so glad that I found her back..

Its already October, and in less than 3 mths we will be in the year 2009. Yet again, you'll hve to think back what have you accomplished for this year. What have you done, and what you have not do. Have you gain some or lose some. There is so much things in going thru my head.

Yes you can always say, "dah lah jangan fikir kan sangat.." Of course you will have to think about it. Things are bound to happen, its a matter of how you take and handle it.. I'm tired, seriously. I leave it all up to HIM, What ever will be, will be...

Its Raya..

It was Nabil's birthday just few days before Raya. I'm glad he likes the CupCake that I got from Chandra..

Alhamdulliah, Raya has been awesome. There was so much 'happening'...

It has been an emotional malam Raya. Eventhough, I probably will not feel the same way as other, it will definately be an emotional one. You can say or pujuk too much when someone's feeling very sad. The only thing you can say was, "jgn lupa doakan Dia."

Pagi Raya, started with Solat Aidilfitri at Masjid Hj Salleh. Later on, we headed home for a nice breakfast of Ketupat with Sambal Satay and Rendang. So much about loosing weight for the whole of Ramadhan then you had those oily stuff on Pagi Raya.. Gosh, my tummy just couldnt take it any longer. I had stomachache a few days after that. The tummy not use to it as yet.

Waited for the rest of the family to come over in the afternoon. Thats the best part of Raya. Attending to the guest, as usual ever since we shift next to Tok, we didnt get to jalan Raya at all.. I only get to go to Ayah Angah place the usual last house on 1st day Raya..

I was still off from work on 2nd day Raya. Decided to continue the Puasa. We only started our Raya back over the weekend.. Went to visit on the East area on Sunday, lucky we get to tumpang Bapak Rahim and Andak's car. Most of the time if i visited Bapak Rahim's place, its a ritual to singgah next door. Its been over 6 years since I last see him. It was a shocked.. I'm glad it actually tested how I felt about things. The only person on my mind was Y at that time. I have learn to let go of things, Alhamdulliah. I manage to face it and be cool about it. I called Y right after that, telling Y that I met him after so long. He asked what was on my mind and how do I feel about meeting him. I said, "dah takde feeling ah.."

Raya is the only time to meet people, which you've meet like once a year. And its probably the only time to seek forgiveness in any case you make any mistake intentional or not intentional. At the same time, you might never know if you'll meet the next Raya. But when your presence was not welcome, its only right that you get on you feel and 'belah' ah apa lagi.. Its sad that things happen that way. It was more than just that actually, but it was too malu to tell. I just pray that we'll become someone who dont bare grudges to other, be more forgiving and accept reality.. Amin..

I only get to meet Y on Friday, after his solat Jumaat, it was just for a while. I was on half day MC, like I said earlier, by tummy just cannot accept food at 3 meals a day. I should maintain my weight actually hehehe.. Its back to meeting like once or twice a week again. But I'm glad Ramadhan has been great for both of us.

I've ended my Puasa 6 just today. So at least, I'll get to lunch with my colleagues tmrw.. Someone is concious that people been saying the weight has increase. It was out of my mind to hear that someone is out to the gym! haahaha.. I cannot believe it. Actually I kind of envy, I wish I can go back to the gym for some work out. Jealouse seh!

Its another Jalan Raya over this weekend. I think everyone will start Jalan Raya this weekend as well, cause some Sec Sch children has ended their exams, so as those sitting for PSLE..

Till then..

Salam Hari Raya Aidil Fitri

Ramadhan Berlalu, Syawal Menjelma..

Dengan Ingatan Tulus Ikhlas,

Dengan Kerendahan Diri,

Mohon Maaf Zahir & Batin,

Di atas setiap Kesalahan.

Salam Aidil Fitri

Counting Days..

We are only a week away. Remember being excited when Raya's drew near. So much things to look forward to.. As you grew older, that feeling of excited grew lesser. Especially when the last 10 days of Puasa, you feel that its the time is gets shorter.

I had a splendid weekend. My Saturday has been the most meaningful thing that any other day. Eventhough time was limited, but it really worthwhile. I really miss the boy more since that day.

I still have not clear up my room heheeh.. I'll wait till the last minute perhaps.

I got a shocking news yesterday evening, my dear friend found out her husband chating on the net with some woman. According to her this is not her 1st or 2nd encounter. She had it, made a harsh move by asking him to get out of home. I told her dont act thru anger, think of the consequences. She choose to go on seperate ways for the mean time. I told her dont think of negativity, think of a solution to the problem. If there's a need to see a consultant, then she should.. I just hope for the best, my doa's with you..

Glad to hear my friend has given birth to a baby Boy, Congrats to you. Alhamdulliah, even after a week in the hospital and a long labour wait..

Got to Go..

Ten Days more..

Didnt realise how fast the time flies, we are already on the 20th Day of Puasa.. I've not miss any day yet, Alhamdulliah. It has been a beautiful Ramadhan for me this year, Alhamdulliah and glad it brings happiness into someone's life and make it better.

I was off from work on Monday and Tuesday, had to work 3 days straight from Wednesday to Friday. I then realise how tiring it can be working 3 days in a row. Too much 'lemak' cause didnt get to work full time in a longest time. And too much 'lemak' for Y, MC for a week, he indeed enjoy having to be away from the usual hectic work week. Well back to work on Monday my dear. He's getting much much better, only the swelling on the knee makes him uncomfortable to bend.

I had my work review just last few days, it was not really something pleasant to hear. But I guess its all due to me losing focus when listening to instruction or getting those numbers right. So I just have to back up if I want to continue working. I mention being comfortable working 3 days a week. I'm hopng for the best cause its all up to me to decide what is best.

The Ayah read the blog, didnt clear the cache. The Daughter saw the link at the history, view and read it, know what is going on. All due to the Ayah's fault not clearing the history. And yesterday, the Daughter read the Ayah's sms when the phone msg alert was on. The Ayah's charging the phone, the Daughter giggle reading it. Nothing mushy was written, "I'm leaving for Masjid, walking with Mak and Ayah" except for the jargon the Ayah and SMS sending call each other. I think the Daughter told the Grandma, Ayah gets into trouble or not??? heehehe..

I didnt see my cousin's for the whole time Puasa was on. But earlier Kak Liza called saying they having Buka at our place today. Glad such a plan being decided, misses Nabilah anyway..

I just completed helping Ayah painted the wall at our hall Lime Green! This has been our 3rd year at our new place. So we should do some changes this year. We are kind of relax this year. Mak didnt really cook so much, we just eat anything simple for Buka or Sahur. We dont want the food goes to a waste. Most of the time, its just 1 lauk or Bubur Masjid, or Mee Hoon Goreng. And thats it. Kueh? I just went with Mak 2 Tuesdays ago and buy them at Raja Kueh. Only next week, Mak will probably be making Kueh Tart and Makmur just for us. We made Cornflakes and that it.

I seriously got to do a final kemas in my room. Tomorrow perhaps... Tengok lah hehehe... Just did a bilas of my baju kurung that I just bought few weeks back. Already plan on what to wear on 1st day or the other jalan raya outfits. And already got the tudung ready, cause thats important.. Other than that, dah.. its just as sederhana as any other Raya..

Whats important now is the last 10 days of Puasa, and I hope I will not have to miss Terawih for this few days. The only chance to panjat kan doa whatever that you wish for it to be. Insya ALLAH..

I just hope my dear friend who's been warded since Monday gets in labour soon, and everything is fine with her Insya ALLAH.

There is another weekend to go before Raya comes.. The time is so fast!

syukur..

It was raining heavily in the morning. Monday, as usual, is my working day.. as usual, sms Y telling him I'm leaving for work. I said, "ride carefully, its raining.." that was 8.10am.

I didnt receive his reply, I thought maybe he's on the way to work. The MRT was supper crowded this morning, I had to let 3 train passes me. I end up taking the train at 8.25am. Reach Raffles place MRT, I just realise I had a call from Y. I was shocked to hear that he met with an accident on the way to work. Fortunately, he manage to speak to me. But we didnt get to talk for long. I decided to take the day off, told Bren, I will come back to work tmrw instead. Impulsive act, took the train all the way to Simei. But he's doing ok, back home injured his right knee and bruises on both hands.

Not long, I reach home, helping Mak with kueh cornflakes (sempat!). I got an sms from Teeba that my close friend Nur Aini's father's just passes on. Al-Fatihah to Md Yat.

I'm leaving to visit Aini at Bedok with Suzana..

Syukur Y's is save. I manage to make coffee for him yesterday when he requested me to make one after terawih!

Two weeks to Puasa, Continue all those Doa's

I have not been meeting any of my cousins, CCK or SAV. Everyone's busy with Puasa as Terawih. We never plan any iftar meet up, because everyone wants the convenient of eating at home and solat at the nearest Masjid from home.

Y has been a faithful reader of my blog recently. He asked yesterday, "never update your blog?" I'm super lazy actually haahaha..

Is almost two weeks to Puasa. And its been almost 2 weeks since I see Y everyday during Terawih. Things has never been better, Alhamdulliah. Now, he has met the family - my parents, two sisters and BIL and Tok!

Oh, I've got news that travel from cargo that someone's getting married. Its about time for him, I hope he understand that there is someone who is willing to give that love to him. Because I can't do that.. And he know every well that I was so much into Y that he was being ignored 14years back! Only HE knows what is best for us and who ever know that J's going with SM and Y and me are back together. Itu semua kerja ALLAH kerana DIA yang menentukan semua nya.. And I'm here to Doakan yang terbaik for you, Amin.

Ok there's nothing much to update actually. Apart from going Geylang with Mak on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Work on alternate days. Still continue those exchange of sms with CT, we chat a bit just yesterday.. Ok its progressing much better, Alhamdulliah. And the boy just cant stop saying my name this few days. He instantly recognize upon seeing picture of me..

MC on Friday, because my eyes just refuse to shut and my brain continue working. I didnt sleep a wink last Friday, gosh.. was fully awake up till 4am! I got like 30mins nap, then the buzzer alarm for Sahur was all over the room.. I got up feeling heavy on my head. I do not want to risk going to work feeling the headache. I had some sleep after Subuh till almost 9.30am. Got up to the Clinic, came home sleep again till almost 1pm. Should be back to work on Monday..

So what cooking today? Got to Go!

Its a Blessing.

Wishing everyone Selamat Menjalani Ibadah Puasa.. Hope you're all in the best of health, Insya ALLAH.

I have so much to blog, but just to lazy.. furthermore its like the story is so basi already hehehe.. Just when I was posting, I got a call from my SH friend, Ernie. She's asking me how to post something on Multiply. Told her coincidently, I am doing some posting. She mention meeting Gaya and Lea a few days ago or something. She told them that I'm seeing someone. They told her.. ya we know, read on her blog posting hahah...

The last Friday, just before Puasa, had plan lined up for the whole day. In the morning, Mak's work out makcik had the last makan2 session before Puasa.. Had mee siam that morning.

The same morning, I met Kak Liza at HarbourFront to collect our ferry ticket to Batam the next day. Concern that the ticket might run out, cause Dier and Zaf coming along. After collection, had breakfast (again) at Banquet Vivo. Later on, she drove me back home..

Made plans with Nya' to meet her for lunch. We only manage to meet at TKC at around 3pm. She get excited walking along TKC and Geylang. Reminded us of our younger Airport days where we use to Buka at Geylang after work and roaming around the Bazaar. She indeed misses that moment, and this year she get to Puasa back in Singapore..

We had a pretty late lunch, till almost 4.30pm at Hjh Maimunah, its her 1st time there.. Check out the stolen picture of her.

My office colleagues has made prior arrangement to have dinner at Straits Kitchen, Hyatt. That night, we had our makan sampai kenyang session there. My last round of food intake..

Azlin and Suzana

Riah

Garlic Nan and Butter Chicken

That evening, I randomly sms Y if he could fetch me from Hyatt. Just trying my luck.. He was at Woodlands, so cant promise if the time permits.. I didnt have like 5 rounds of food or what. But I guess because I had that Calamaci and Asam drink before food, I became bloated. Dont asked what happen to me that night, I had to leave home early hahaha..

Feeling bad that he didnt get to fetch me that evening, Y called, "what happen to you dear??" I said I'm feeling sick! All because of the drink..

The next morning, I left for Batam for a day with Kak Liza, Nana, Dier, Zaf and Chandra. I didnt intend to shop much, but I was really happy that I get to buy tudung, a blouse (kak I owe kak liza haha), a shirt for Y (that I have not gave him yet), some kerepek and most important is masker, lulur that I really wanted to buy there. I just spend less than $100 for all that..

I sleep over Kak Liza, Andak's place that night. Knowing that Sunday evening will be a Terawih night, they send me back home in the afternoon.. As usual, I had my terawih at Masjid Salleh. Y asked if I want to go to Masjid Kassim, told him the next time perhaps. Suddenly someone need company, I totally forgot that its his 1st Ramadhan without his better half. He misses her! There is nothing wrong with missing her, she has always been there for more than 10 years. My prayers is always with her..

It almost a week of Ramadhan today. Time passes so fast... Another weekend, and counting down to Raya. But the children's exams is coming very soon. Exchange of sms with CT just last weekend. That lady is doing fine. Today, she just reply to my sms after last few days I send it to her.. Exams are like 2 weeks from now. Hope she get to catch up on things. I dont blame her for losing focus, she just lost her Mama. Just like the Ayah, I'm sure she has that moment when she misses her by her side.

Ok got to go.. taking a short nap and gonna wake up when Asar comes.